Health Leader, The Power of Love

STORY BY

Ronda Wendler

Her pulse quickens, her eyes brighten and her stomach flutters when he's near. She can't concentrate, but doesn't care. She's lively, giddy, euphoric. Is this love?

Not exactly - but it could be a beginning. These behaviors are common in an initial stage of love known as "infatuated love," says Blair Justice, Ph.D., professor emeritus of psychology at The University of Texas School of Public Health at Houston. Justice is the author of five award-winning books that explore how being in love affects our physical health.

Is this love?

Before answering this question of questions, it's important to understand that one person's love is another person's like, is another person's lust, etc. Each of us moves at our own pace along the continuum of human emotion. At any time, "like" can morph into "love," primitive "lust" can evolve into higher-level "like," and so on.

In other words, there is no easy solution to defining this most complex of emotions. Love, at best, inspires euphoric highs and at worst, anguished lows.

Love's Lingo

In a 1988 study, researchers at Yale University attempted to lock in love's lingo by identifying the three types of romantic love that humans experience—infatuated love, compassionate love, and consummate love.

"Infatuated love has only one element - passion. At this juncture, feelings may evolve into a deeper form of love, or not," Justice explains.

The second type of love—compassionate love—incorporates intimacy and commitment, but no passion. Two people experiencing compassionate love can enjoy a comfortable, predictable relationship, perhaps even a marriage - but without the "sizzle."

Consummate, complete love is the only type that includes all three ingredients—passion, intimacy and commitment.

"You hit the jackpot when you find consummate love. Not only do you get the cake (the deep-level feelings), but you also get the icing (romantic sparks flying)," Justice says. "This is the gold standard—the ultimate achievement."

For some, the trek to intimacy is as strenuous as scaling Mount Everest.

The Other 'F' Words

"Do you desire true intimacy?" Justice asks. "If so, you've got to be willing to disclose the three "F"s - fears, failures and fantasies. Doing so renders you vulnerable, but it's an emotional investment you must make to achieve true love," he says.

Men, taught to be infallible and strong from childhood, frequently fail at intimacy, Justice adds, which explains why so many never progress past the infatuated love stage.

Taking Love to the Lab

Regardless of what type of love you're experiencing, chances are you may be healthier than if you were not in love at all," Justice says.

That's because the same bodily chemicals that make our lovestruck pulses pound and our hearts skip beats can do wonders for our physical health. Attachment, it seems, is fundamentally rooted in brain chemistry.

Take, for example, endorphins. First discovered in 1975, endorphins are credited with enhancing the immune system, relieving pain, reducing stress, and postponing the aging process. Activated through physical exercise (sex included), endorphins produce the "runner's high" and the athlete's "second wind." Rather than feeling pain and exhaustion while running, endorphins may actually help us feel limber and energized toward the end of a race.

Sexual activity, from commencement to completion, can increase endorphin production as much as 200 percent, say researchers at Johns Hopkins University .

"This explains why people consumed in the torrid throes of a hot romance can stay up all night, then go to work the next morning feeling energized," Justice says.

As endorphins escalate, additional chemicals crescendo, including the "pleasure" chemical dopamine, and norepinephrine, a neurotransmitter related to positive reinforcement.

An intoxicating chemical cocktail now surges through the psyche.

While this "romantic rush" works wonders for some, it can become a junkie's high for others. "Some people become 'love addicts' moving methodically from one person to another, staying only long enough to get through the initial attraction," Justice says.

Better Than Botox

David Weeks, Ph.D., a neuropsychologist at Royal Edinburgh Hospital and author of Secrets of the Super Young , found that individuals in a committed relationship who have sex four to five times a week look more than 10 years younger than the average person who has sex twice a week.

Indulging in promiscuous sex, however, promoted, rather than reduced, the aging process.

Ongoing physical contact, not just sex alone, releases not only endorphins but also the hormone oxytocin, which plays a part in human bonding. Together, the two chemicals are like natural opiates that help stabilize a romantic relationship by inducing what Michel Odent, M.D., of London 's Primal Health Research Center and author of the book The Scientification of Love, calls a "drug-like dependency."

Not very romantic, but still, it's the glue that binds, Justice says.

Intimate touching, whether holding hands, walking arm-in-arm, or softly stroking a lover's face, has also been shown to increase certain antibodies that fight disease and promote growth hormones, he says.

Studies show that premature infants in hospital nurseries produce increased growth hormones when held and stroked by nurses, a phenomenon that has convinced many hospitals to adopt "touching measures" designed to help babies thrive in neonatal nurseries.

The Human Factor

In his book Love and Survival, noted cardiologist Dean Ornish, M.D., who incidentally studied under Justice's tutelage, writes "love and intimacy are at the root of what makes us sick and what makes us well, what causes sadness and what brings happiness, what makes us suffer and what leads to healing." Love, Ornish believes, has as important an impact on a patient's cardiovascular health as diet, smoking, genetics or exercise.

Recently, researchers at the Institute for HeartMath in Boulder Creek , Calif. discovered that, like the brain, the heart produces chemicals in response to emotions. Love results in a very rhythmic, coherent, beating pattern, while negative emotions spawn erratic patterns.

This conclusion is borne out by more than 50 years of scientific studies.

In a 1952 study, male students at Harvard University completed surveys regarding the nature of their relationships with their parents. Thirty-five years later, the respondents, now in their 50s, underwent physical exams. More than 90 percent of the men who lacked a loving parental relationship suffered from coronary artery disease, hypertension, ulcers and alcoholism. This was double the percentage of illness in men who reported loving parental relationships.

At Case Western Reserve University , 10,000 married men answered the question , "Does your wife show you her love ?" A follow-up study five years later revealed that those who answered "yes" experienced significantly less angina, despite risk factors such as elevated cholesterol, diabetes and high blood pressure.

Numerically speaking, some researchers believe that happily married men and women with heart disease can live almost four years longer than unmarried healthy individuals. Married people who are 20 pounds overweight still have a longer life expectancy than healthy, unmarried people, studies show.

Justice proposes several explanations.

"We all have a basic human desire to connect with other human beings. Alienation and loneliness induce stress, which eventually takes a toll on one's physical health," he explains.

Then, there are the practical, less philosophical explanations. "Compared to their single counterparts, most married men have a distinct advantage. Their wives plan balanced meals, cook, and nag their husbands to keep doctors' appointments," Justice explains. "I'm not saying women should be relegated to caretakers. But generally speaking, they're better at running the show."

Avoiding risky sex is another marital advantage in light of today's dicey dating scene, he adds.

The overriding message, confirmed again and again by decades of research, is that the power of love improves our health, Justice says.

"We can all be reassured that the more we love and are loved, the healthier we become."